So let’s see, I’ve been off Chantix for about 4 or 5 days now. It was a blazing success and short of wanting to smoke because I had nothing else to do, the cravings aren’t there. As long as I stay active, I don’t miss smoking, even after a drink or two.

by pencildreams.com

Enter a new problem.

I’ve had a general disdain for all around me. It’s not that anything is irritating or that I’m mad about anything, I just don’t really care and I don’t know why. I’m uninspired, nothing that is typically good, is as enjoyable as it once was and until about 30 minutes ago, I assumed that I was finally losing my mind.

I’m not the grumpy ‘emo’ type. Don’t get me wrong, I’m very emotional but typically in an energetic happy way. I’m not this dark person that I’ve been for… let’s see… 4 or 5 days. I was just on the phone with FMT and the topic of my melancholy came up. Apparently a friend of ours went more manic coming off the pills than going on them… basically, I’m in detox right now and it’s numbing. Forgive any attitude you might have picked up over the past few days. I promise I’m getting better.  Chantix is getting in its final blows.  I told you… little blue vomit demons.

::UPDATE:: I’m not alone!  Check it out!

It occurred to me that I hadn’t quite closed the Chantix book for you so at the request of several I offer the final chapter… and yes, it worked.

In previous posts I noted that within a week no amount of smoking was doing anything for my cravings or mood. I subsequently turned into Mr. Hyde every night by about 10pm. It seemed that the longer I stayed awake, the angrier I got. FMT shouldered a lot of this moodiness and I thank her every day for putting up with me.

I did, admittedly, continue smoking periodically through most of the month but since it wasn’t providing the once needed nicotine rush to the brain, I never really enjoyed them like I once did. And after a couple of weeks of dosing religiously, technically the physical addiction was curbing. The mental addiction was now the side still being served. I no longer smoked at work, providing for some quietly stressful moments at my desk at times when I’d usually run outside… but I held strong and never even bummed a smoke.

Now I’m done with the pills (that’s a -1 on my ‘women and prescription drugs’ post) and I’m happy to say I’m done smoking as well. To secure the end of an era, I had a tooth pulled today, demanding that I not smoke for fear of dry sockets and adding another temporary prescription to afore mentioned post.

The good news is that I feel stronger for going through the very vivid dreams, the wild mood shifts and the general discomfort that was the month of May. Thanks for the encouraging words from all of you through the process and now I’ve got to come up with a new series for you. Any ideas?

Since my return to Arkansas in August of 2007 I’ve been slowly collecting a medicine cabinet full of daily preventatives. As a person who historically hasn’t been one for medication, I’ve developed a theory. Women keep drug companies in business. Let’s start from the top:

75mg generic “Acid Reducer”, Walmart’s version of Prilosec – originally prescribed by my mother upon my return to the state from grad school. I carry my stress in my stomach and my teeth. My stomach burns and I grind my teeth when in really stressful situations. My mother decided that the large bottle of Tums I took weekly wasn’t the answer and got me on these. Daily dose 1.

Super B complex – originally prescribed by my then-girlfriend, FMT about a year into my new career. I was feeling generally run down, possibly from the entire life swap from night owl creative to 6:30am corporate ad guy… or trading bar hopping for lawn work… or was it the smoking, at this point, who knows but the fact remains, I was much to young to feel this damned old. Enter the Super-B complex. Choke down with food and milk to avoid upset stomach and spazmatic vomitus. Side effects may vary by specimen but generally include odd aftertaste and neon urine that glows under black light. Daily dose 2.

Chantix – originally prescribed by my doctor, imagine that… and did I mention she’s a woman? In response to the slowly growing medicine regimen, I started to look for the source of my woes. Smoking causes heartburn and robs you of energy. Quit that and maybe I’m good to go. After many attempts over several years to quit on my own I figured, hey, what’s one more pill to take for a month? What can in hurt? My insurance even covered it. And speaking of upset stomach, click the “Chantix” keyword in the cloud to the right and read all about it. The good news is that it works… well. Daily dose 3.

Amoxicillin – originally prescribed by my dentist, not a woman but FMT made me go so this one is on her as well. So a tooth I broke in grad school, read “grind my teeth” above, decided to try to kill me last weekend in Las Vegas. Bright and early on Monday of this week FMT set up an appointment at her dentist for that afternoon. She’s nothing if not efficient. Before any work could be done on the tooth, they had to kill the infection under/inside (?) it. Now I’m on Amoxicillin three times a day but as with Chantix, there’s an end date in sight for this one as well. Daily dose 4.

They’re pulling the tooth next Thursday, at which point I’m expecting another daily. Look for updates on that. I’ve also run through a few scripts for pulled muscles, illness, persistent cough, etc. I’m not saying they don’t work its just a little weird. I haven’t taken more than a Tums and an Aspirin in upwards of 10 years and now I feel like I need one of those pill boxes like my grandmother keeps in her purse with the days of the week on it.

A key side effect of Chantix is vivid, bad dreams. I was warned by the doctor, the pharmacist, a friend who has seen success with it, and most blogs about it. Initially, I thought, ‘nah, not me… I don’t even dream that much.’ …and I didn’t, until about Thursday night.

I’ve seen a gradual brightening of my dreams from a hazy blur of far-from-memorable oddities to a now life paralleling vivacity. Thursday night my entire night was a day at the office. I realized Friday evening that I most likely made reference to dream conversations with coworkers on Friday morning. No, coworkers, I haven’t lost my mind, I’m on medication.

Last night, apparently a cohort and I were shooting our way out of a naval brig. Odd thing was, we were navy as well so we were shooting to disable. On the first attempt, we almost made it then were surrounded and returned to our cell after accidentally killing one guard. I woke up during the second escape attempt, and did I mention that the brig looked like a 5 star hotel? I’m losing my mind and more than somewhat curious as to what the dream analysts would read from this.

I hear that I’m only scratching the surface dream-wise. The good news is that I haven’t smoked today at all. I had a few yesterday but for the last week I’ve been spinning my wheels. They do nothing for me and taste like eating ceiling tiles out of an old honky-tonk. I think I’m done with them. We’ll see as the week goes on. An additional positive note is that I’ve got the nausea down to about an hour after each pill daily which is much more manageable than the day-long near vomit from the previous post.

Per requests, I’m continuing the segment on my experience with Chantix. Today, day 8 of my 28 day experiment and, coincidentally, day 1 of the full dose has been interesting. I haven’t coughed confidently for most of the day and standing up is right on up there with looking into a toilet when you’ve been over-served. Needless to say, the nausea is here.

As for the smoking, I’ve slowed dramatically. This could be because my favorite Camels now taste more like their namesake, soaked in diesel fuel, but probably mostly because they make me cough. See paragraph one on coughing confidently… Further, when I do smoke, I’m not getting anything from it. This might be mental but for the most part, as soon as I’m done, I crave another but don’t want it. Either they’re working or I’m nuts and neither has been ruled out to this point.
The latest piece of my little “quit smoking” puzzle has been the addition of muscle relaxers as a sleep aid. Fear not, they were prescribed for a torn muscle a few weeks ago. I just haven’t made it through the script yet. These little beauties don’t necessarily knock me out when I’m too nauseous to sleep; I think they just calm the gag reflex enough to help me lay down. An added bonus is that near trance consciousness that the Chantix/Flexiril cocktail is providing has so-far, staved off the highly publicized night terrors that Chantix is known for. I’m not saying I won’t get them; I’m just not getting them yet.

Stay tuned for more updates and please feel free to post your experiences as well. I’m thinking of starting a sub-blog on this little journey and would love to have a contributor or two.